Working On My Third Draft

Hi all,

I had a mass purge of my social media last week due to being followed across to other platforms and harassed there. At the moment, only my Tumblr and this blog are online.

My main reason to cut the drama out of my life is because I’m super busy right now. Uni coursework, as always, but also with revising and querying! I enrolled in a course with New Leaf Literary Agency, and I submitted my practice query and first five pages tonight. Even though it was only for the course, it was still super nerve-racking to hit that send button. I get feedback on the 17th February so I’m both super excited and super nervous because I’ll be able to use the critique to help me prepare for the real thing.

Their course was really useful and helped me make my plan of action with querying, and I’m so glad I signed up for it. It’s really helped put me in the mindset and prepare me for this part of my journey.

I’m currently just over 50% through my third draft – which has been another almost full page one rewrite, and I’m hoping to get that done by the end of next month. Hopefully after some more brushing over and a fourth draft, (missing words are the bane of my life) I’ll be able to start querying the agents on my list!

To all my old readers, I want to share some snippets of moments I’ve added because I love these new hilarious bits. Glyn is at it again, basically.

Some of the things I’ve changed so far are:

  • Beginning goes from 7.5k to nearly 14k to flesh out Yoshka and Inna’s world more
  • Cut a bunch of scenes and words out (i.e. the 7k I added in got taken out here) from around the 20% mark where the pace was soooo slow.
  • Kira is now Inna’s aunt because it makes more sense why she would become Queen once Inna kills Ruslan
  • Vadik became Vadim because oops, Vadik is apparently a diminutive of Vadim *slaps wrist*
  • Had a ball with getting my head around fancy Russian names. Super complicated but super fun! Inna is now Inessa Vadimovna Talanova (Inna for short – or Nessie if you’re Glyn).
  • I finally gave the Empress a name… after two years. Behold Empress Naenia Aelius, who is as crazy as ever. And I fleshed out her backstory a little more – I just hope I can squeeze a mention in somewhere.
  • Ruslan gets some funny bantz with Inna before she, you know, kills him.
  • Hangings galore! Totally keeping this PG with my violent descriptions over here… Oh and Inna almost gets hanged for buying a book which they thought she’d stolen.
  • The hand kissing scene! *Squee* That’s one that’s on my share to blog list so watch this space for when that one gets posted.
  • Oh, and we’re back to first person *grins* I guess I like that level of intimacy after all. But I love third for blocking and plot hole fixing because of that added distance!

Lots changing, as always with my drafts! I definitely love this version soooo much more. Also, I took Glyn in a *slightly* different direction this draft because I felt he was a little too forward at times in the previous. But I haven’t really touched him for the most part! I just toned down his very, very worst moments. I do think he’s probably funnier and more charming in this version though, so that makes up for it.

Okay, so the first snippet I want to show you is one from where they first meet and are running from those guards. As soon as I chose Inessa as Inna’s full name, this scene was born 😂

We continued in the same direction we had been walking before the guards had interrupted us. And after a while, Glyn said, “What’s your name, anyway?”

“I’d rather not tell you.”

“Ah well, missy I’ll have to call you forever then.”

“Please don’t.”

“Not got any choice, have I missy?”

We fell silent again, keeping to the shadows – though they hardly concealed my ballgown. Whenever footsteps approached, we hid in the narrow gaps between buildings. Sometimes it was only townspeople but other times, it was guards. Thankfully, Glyn didn’t dare try to cover my dress with his body again. Maybe he believed my threat after all.

“Where are you taking me?” I demanded many streets later.

“To find you some less obvious clothes – unless you want to try and slip past the guards dressed like that, missy.”

“You’re really going to keep calling me that as much as you can?”

“Aye, that I am, missy.”

I let out a long sigh. “Fine. Inessa Vadimovna.” I stopped before saying my surname. His accent marked him as not being from Yoshka – most likely Glawyr instead – so he probably wasn’t too familiar with our politics. But I didn’t dare chance that he recognised the name of the ruling family. Maybe he would think me more trouble than my magic was worth. Leaving out the princess part was for the best.

“You know,” he said, “I don’t speak any Yoskiy.”

“That was my name.”

“And I didn’t catch one word of it.”

“It was only two. My given name and patronym.” But Glyn only blinked at that explanation and I supposed it meant to him as much as a sentence in Yoskiy would have. “How about Inessa then? Is that any easier for you?”

His face cracked into a grin. “Nessie?”

“No, Inessa.”

“So, Nessie for short.”

“If you really insist on shortening my name, then I’d rather you call me Inna.”

“I like Nessie more. Suits you better.”

“Of course you’d think that.”

(And we’re now 57k words through and he’s still insisting on Nessie because you know – Glyn.)

15 comments

I really liked the Water Waeaver, and I can’t wait to buy the book once and if it’s published. But what about Glass Dragons? I also really loved that series, and the ending left me hanging!

I’m working on TWW first! I will return to Shao one day but if you have a scroll through my posts on here, it’ll be the version with Lu Yulan like in the snippet I shared with them both 🙂

Alright, thanks! I’ll be looking!

Wow! I like it! And Inna’s new name? Interesting. I like how Glynn is still Glynn with just a few changes and the scene where they are running from the guards still retains most of its original state.
Also, the feedback will be great. Good luck and keep it up. You are almost there.

Yeah, Glyn will still be Glyn 🙂 ❤

Loved that scene to bits, and still can’t get over the Nessie part lol. Love Glyn OMG! 😍😍

❤❤❤❤

Ah! I think it’s good that you’re separating yourself from all that drama and harassment, whoever they are to follow you everywhere for the sake of harassment are bullies, trolls, and criminals (exaggerated) out to get you! Like geez, they’ve got you kicked off Site-That-Shall-Not-Be-Named, what do they want? And Glynn being Glynn, calling her some sort of nickname, haha! And Russian has such long and fancy names that it’s befitting of royalty, it’s a nice change. Good luck on getting Water Weaver published! Best of wishes! ❤

i love this so much, i can’t wait to finally buy it ahh ♡

Hopefully one day! ❤❤

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaasss :DDDD

Azalea Cartwright

AHHHHHHHHH the nostalgia *sniff*
I will have to spend time for another mini essay when I get my hands on your published book *sniff harder*
Oh God I miss them sooooo much

I love this part <3 and I'm sure the entire thing will be amazing

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